Today is the day

[simplyn2deep]

Today's my Dad's memorial/funeral service.

After the service we're going over to my mom's cousin's house for lunch. I really really don't want to. So many thing I don't want to do but will because I don't want people to tell me anything.

One day I'll feel more like an adult and can feel comfortable telling people in my family no and stick to it.

My apartment is filled with people. I shared a room with my mom. I just want to sleep/veg away.

My friend thinks I might be a little bit depressed. I know I was over summer, I probably still could be.

Jasmine and I are going to get somewhat matching tattoos in honor of my dad (her grandpa) the next time we get money.

Comments

[heffermonkey.livejournal.com]

I hope you got through the day with the minimal of discomfort considering the situation and feeling you can't 'escape' the family expectations. I've been there, where you feel compelled, obligated even when it's the last thing you want to do or last place you want to be. We all mourn in our own, personal ways and you probably need the time to grieve alone - some people want the comfort of others, you want the comfort of solitude, that's only natural. I hope in time you get that.

And the tatoos sound like a lovely way to remember your father and a lovely something you can have with you always. Love and hugs hun, be strong, take each day as it comes - you get through things like this one hour at a time x